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Daily Swim

10 Commandments of the Pool

1 – Thou shall bathe before entering the poolPool commandment 1:Thou shall shower before entering the pool

It might be called a public ‘swimming bath’, but that doesn’t mean it’s a substitute for an actual bath! Washing [not just wetting] yourself before swimming helps to maintain a safe level of  hygiene, not to mention water visibility too. It’s not fun to swim in other people’s grime!

Image credit: Digital Sextant, on Flikr

2 – Thou shant swim if thou ist illPool commandment 2: Thou shant swim if thou ist ill

No one wants to swim in a cesspit. If you’ve been suffering from a dicky tummy or another viral nasty – please for the greater good –  ask yourself if you’re really well enough to enter the pool. Chlorine can only do so much in the way of fighting bacteria…

Image credit: Metro centric, on Flikr

3 – Thou shalt not leerPool commandment 3: Thou shalt not leer

No one wants a ‘Mr Fitzherbert’ in their pool!  Those with voyeuristic tendencies, or inclined to do more oggling than swimming should be avoided at all cost. Leering, whether from behind tinted goggles or more openly with craned neck or slimy smile is simply bang out of order!

Image credit: David.nikonvscanon, on Flikr

Pool commandment 4 - Thou shall control thy youndlings4 – Thou shall keep control of thy younglings

It’s fantastic to see kids (away from a screen) having fun and [high-pitched-screaming aside] it’s great to see families enjoying some quality time together. However, noone wants to take a flying float to the side of the head, find themself unable to surface due to stray flotation devices, or be jumped on ‘bomb-style’ from a great height… Whether present in the pool or not, parents shouldn’t sack-off their responsibilities to the lifeguards – who are there to save lives rather than babysit.


Pool commandment 5: Thou shall not toilet in the pool5 – Thou shalt not toilet in the pool

Mr Hanky and friends are not welcome in the pool! And though some might think it’s okay to take a cheeky wee in the sea, it’s certainly NOT acceptable in the pool. Noone wants to swim in a toilet!

Image credit: Webwin, on Flikr

Pool commandment 6 - Thou shall tame thy hair

6 – Thou shall tame thy hair

Who wants to leave the pool with a hairball stuck in their throat; or find their fingers bound together by strands of other people’s hair? Mmm, you only have to  take a look at your own bathroom plughole to appreciate why thou should tame thy hair before getting into the pool. [Not just your barnet either..but all other unruly areas too]

Image credit: GabrielaP93, on Flikr

Pool commandment 7 - Thou shall wear suitable swimwear7 – Thou shall wear suitable swimwear

Some swimwear simply isn’t engineered for actual swimming. Sun-bathing or casual floating, maybe, but not for ‘jumping in’ or a fast stroke. Swimwear doesn’t leave too much to the imagination anyway; but it should at the very least fit properly, stay up/in place, not turn see-through, and must cover your bare necessities!

Image credit: Bengt E Nyman, on Flikr

Pool commandment 8 - Thou shall don a verruca sock8 – Thou shall don a verruca sock

Sharing is not caring when it concerns foot infections – simple! Swimming pools and showers are prime locations for verrucas to spread, so if you’ve got one and still want to swim, then be responsible and keep it to yourself. Or, please see commandment 2.

Image credit: Taberandrew, on Flikr

Pool commandment 10 - Thou shall keep thy hands to thyself10 – Thou shall keep thy hands to thyself

Some might think the pool a great location for a date, for obvious reasons. However for all those who are thinking of taking a romantic dip together, please remember: there are other people around, water is transparent, and a public pool really isn’t the place for PDAs & heavy petting. Enough said.

Image credit: Wolfsavard, on Flikr

2 Comments

  1. Haha I love this “Mr Hanky and friends are not welcome in the pool!”.

    I can’t swim so have to say I forgotten that going to a pool was not just for lounging about, look nice and drinking. 🙂

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